Monday, November 28, 2011

Amateurs and Pros

I just noticed the Christmas decorations at Fahrenheit 88:


Now, what on earth are they thinking?  That is an absolutely miserable attempt.  On a good day that could almost be considered tasteful.  That will not do at all - they have got to learn from the masters at Pavilion:


Now, THAT is how it's done.  Nobody can make absolutely mad and utterly tasteless decorations than the guys at Pavilion.  They have taken the art form to an entirely different level.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Brilliant Air Asia "Service"

Just received this SMS from Air Asia:

RM0.00 Urgent! AirAsia flight AK 828 from Kuala Lumpur  to Phuket on 22nd Nov 2011 is now DELAYED to 2110 hrs(09.10 pm). We apologise for the inconvenience caused

I got two problems with this. First of all I received this SMS at 8.05pm 5 minutes before scheduled takeoff. Second problem is the delay was actually until 11pm. Useless!

Healy Mac's Cattle Hoarding

As readers of this blog have probably realized already, I am generally not impressed by the service in Malaysian bars and restaurants. Generally poor and inattentive service is caused by uneducated staff and clueless owners and it is not particularly malicious.  For the past year or so I have been a fairly regular visitor to Healy Mac's in Changkat Bukit Bintang, but yesterday I had what I can only describe as a quite shocking experience there.

When I arrived I bumped into a friend of mine who was seated at a tiny table squeezed into a corner.  One of the staff approached us and suggested we moved to a larger table.  While moving I pointed out to the staff that this larger table had a sign saying "reserved" on it.  The staff said that was not a problem and removed the reserved sign from the table.  I now proceeded to order drinks and dinner for two.  About five minutes after the drinks arrived, but before dinner arrived, another staff approached us and informed us rudely that "we had to move to another table since this table is reserved".  I pointed out that we had been seated at this particular table by one of the staff (and pointing out to said staff that the table had a reserved sign) and that I found it extremely inconvenient to hoarded around like cattle - in fact inconvenient to a point where I would rather enjoy dinner in an alternative establishment if they insisted.  A few minutes later the manager of the place arrived and ordered us to leave the table.  He used the word sorry a lot but this must be the particular Malaysian type of sorry (which is just a word with no meaning whatsoever) and the fact that we had been seated at the table by a member of the staff didn't seem to have any influence whatsoever.  At the end of the day I gave up and went to another restaurant for dinner.

While having dinner at Finnegan's, I couldn't help myself thinking about good old Fawlty Towers:


It is extremely funny watching John Cleese make an arse of himself, but trust me - my experience in Healy Mac's was not funny.

I can't help myself thinking if this is in some way related to the infamous quiz night.  Last year Healy Mac started having a weekly quiz night on Mondays and in the beginning it was great fun.  Unfortunately at some point the whole thing started being way too serious and to me that reached the pinnacle when I was invited to join some kind of "championship" and without being told or asked turned out to be representing Healy Mac and the name of our team was forcefully changed to reflect that ("Healy Mac's ...). I pointed out that I don't represent any commercial entity without getting compensated so I immediately resigned from the team and have not participated in the quiz night ever since.  I guess in some way this might have been the manager's little revenge but it is mind boggling how something that should be fun can turn into something this serious.

Speculation aside nothing can change the fact that the staff and the manager of Healy Mac's stepped out of line in this case and what is worse - they did this knowingly.  How on earth they can justify treating their customers with this little respect is beyond me and I can only urge everybody to avoid this place completely.

One last thing.  I did notice a few complaints on Healy Mac's facebook page, and I did in fact comment on one myself.  However, within 24 hours my comment (and the other negative comments) were deleted.  I have seen this before and I can only repeat that places who do not stand up to public scrutiny but have to hide criticism has got serious problems and that alone is reason enough not to visit them. A serious pub or restaurant listen to their customers complaints - that is the only way they can improve.  A place who ignore and try to hide negative comments is a place who have no intention or wish to improve.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

What are the Odds?

Just now I was waiting for a while outside McDonald's on Bukit Bintang and there was a group of 6 deaf ladyboys chatting away using sign language.  At first I didn't think much about it, but I was bored waiting and then it struck me - this was actually quite a unique experience.

I mean - face it - how many guys discover they are ladyboys?  1 in 1000?  How many people are born deaf?  1 in 1000?  That means that 1 in a million guys is possibly deaf ladyboys.  In other words - there are perhaps 10 in Malaysia - and 6 of those were right in front of me.  Quite incredible.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

A Very Careful Promise

The Malaysian Immigration office web-site states the following:
"Remarks: Passport can be ready in 1 hour after payment"
That is really not much of a promise is it?  It can be ready?  On the other hand - it might actually take 8 hours or several days?

Craftsmanship Malaysian Style

I've been annoyed for a while that my own wireless Internet is just exactly out of reach when I'm at the pool.
Finally the management installed wireless Internet at the pool side and that is a good thing.

I am however not exactly impressed with the craftsmanship and I am not sure how long it'll work.
It's not exactly the most professional looking installation I've seen.



Let's zoom in on that a bit.



In-fucking-credible - it would have taken what - half an hour more to extend those wires up to the roof and hide the damn thing up there.

Update, Nov. 17, 2011

OK, I guess that was too ugly and shabby even by local standards, so while having my morning coffee today, the maintenance guy showed up.


He was messing around for about an hour or so, and this was the result:


A tiny little bit better but still not fantastic is it?

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Learn From the French and the Russians

The French managed to sell subs and the Russians managed to sell planes. I bet it's mostly a matter of proper motivation.


Monday, November 7, 2011

Nice try!

Christmas is arriving in KL and as usual it arrives way too early.  Pavilion usually have the most bizarre Christmas decorations and it would appear that this year is no different.

Today I noticed these:


The fun begins when you move up close:


It looks to me that this year they are actually trying to grow Christmas trees and they obviously got it all wrong :)  I don't think they'll be done before Christmas.

Why?

One of the latest monstrosities on Bukit Bintang is the oddly named Fahrenheit 88 (see pic).




Never mind Fahrenheit is exclusively American these days, but 88?

If I am not mistaken, 88 Fahrenheit is roughly 31 degrees Celsius and I find that somewhat odd. What are they trying to say and what's the bloody point?  It's not as if 31 degrees is sort of not cool - and not really hot too - just sort of lukewarm really.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Lars' Principle (or: Avillion Port Dickson Lost the Plot)

The Peter Principle describes how "in a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence".  I'd like to use this opportunity to announce the Lars Principle, which describes how in Malaysia every hotel and/or restaurant keep increasing the price until there's absolutely no value for money left.


The latest example of this is Avillion in Port Dickson.  Avillion have always been expensive.  In fact it has always been damn expensive, however - in my opinion - it has got two things going for it:
  • The rooms are awfully pretty
  • The "adults only" pool
The service have never been all that great and the food is absolutely not spectacular in any way, but those two things sort of made the place worth a visit anyway.  However, now they have raised the price to RM 600++ per night (and that was on a damn Sunday - absurd).  I guess 600 per night would be ok if everything about the place was fantastic, but seriously - it is NOT and in that light the price is truly absurd.

I arrived a bit early on Sunday Oct. 30, 2011, so the room was not ready.  Since I did arrive at 11 that wasn't really surprising and I don't blame them for that.  I just went to the pool to wait there.  However, arriving at the pool, things really went south.  The pool attendant more or less ignored us completely, and when asked about towels his response was: "towels out - no towels - half an hour".  I am sorry - 600 ringgit per night and they are out of towels.  Around 12 I went to see if my room was ready and it was.  While at the reception, I did tell the girl in the reception that it was kind of absurd that they didn't have towels and she promised to take care of it.  She also promised to fix the TV in the room (which was not working).

At 1pm, towels still hadn't arrived at the pool, so I decided to give the manager a call and raise some pulses a bit.  The manager promised to take care of it immediately.  Well, I don't know what was/is her definition of immediately, but the towels finally arrived at 3pm - JUST as it started to rain big time.  In other words - the few hours of sunlight there was, we couldn't really use the pool as there was no towels.

When the rain started, we went to have some lunch.  While having lunch I asked the guy who appeared to be the manager at the Crow's Nest if there was anywhere I could watch the Formula 1 race in the late afternoon.  He promised to check it out and came back a while later and said that it was not possible since they did not have Star Sports channel anywhere.

After lunch, leaving the Crow's Nest restaurant, I went pass Avillion's karaoke bar, and on a sudden impulse I went in and asked the girl in there if they could show Star Sports since I wanted to watch the Formula 1.  The girl said that she would see what she could do and call me when she knew more.  Half an hour later she called and confirmed that of course she could show me the Formula 1.

At 5pm I went to the Karaoke bar and watched the Formula 1.  I did have a chat with the girl working there, and it turns out she was a student and she had only been there for 2 weeks.  Now - let me repeat that - she was a student and had only worked in Avillion for 2 weeks.  In my opinion she was the ONLY person I came across that actually behaved as she worked in an exclusive and expensive resort.  She obviously went above and beyond what is generally expected of staff there and honestly - it is not her that should be a student - she should be the teacher educating the rest of the staff there.  I sincerely hope they pay her well, because she is the only staff they got that actually go out of her way to make the guests feel welcome.

The conclusion is quite obvious though.  Avillion - or rather the owners of Avillion - look at the place as a cash cow.  They try to cash in on the fact that they are seen as the best resort in the area, but in reality they just want your money - they are (with the exception of the before mentioned student) doing absolutely nothing to make guests feel welcome or to justify their absurd pricing.  Needless to say I will try very very hard to find alternative places (and for that price I can actually fly up to Thailand and find one there).

Monday, October 24, 2011

Sad Day at Sepang MotoGP

Yesterday I went to the MotoGP race at Sepang as I have pretty much done the last 5 or 6 years, but this time disaster struck and as a result one of my favorite riders - if not my absolute favorite - lost his life.

For the past year or so, I have been joking that the moment Marco Simoncelli learned to stay ON his bike he would become a world champion.  Obviously those jokes now leave a somewhat bitter taste in my mouth, but then again - that is how MotoGP is isn't it?

I still remember back int he late 90's when Garry McCoy started riding the 500cc bikes.  The guy was completely mental and he went sideways through every bloody corner, pushing the bike to the absolute limit.  At the end of the day, Garry McCoy had so many crashes that he never really won anything (if I am not mistaken he won 3 500cc races in total), but damn - he is to this day the most fantastic rider I have ever seen.  In the 2003 movie "Faster", another MotoGP legend Mick Doohan had this to say about McCoy's riding style:



Normally, a remark like that wouldn't mean much, but coming from Mick Doohan it does mean a lot.  Doohan himself was "a little bit looser than a lot of people". In 1992, Doohan crashed in a practice session before the Dutch TT.  He was inches from losing his leg, but a few month later he showed up again, looking like this:



Doohan went on to win the 500cc championship (it wasn't called MotoGP back then) no less than 5 times on a custom built bike (since he couldn't use a foot operated rear brake).

In 1993, I remember watching Wayne Rainey's crash at the Italian Grand Prix.  Rainey broke his spine and the crash rendered him permanently paralyzed from the chest down.  Still, the following year, he showed up, in a wheel chair, as team manager for the Malboro Yamaha team and to this day he still enjoy Superkart racing, driving a custom build hand operated kart.

At this point you might think: "what on earth is he rambling about".  Well, I guess my point is that it is this very madness that makes a good MotoGP rider become a truly great rider.  There are tons of good riders out there, but only the truly inspired becomes great and Simoncelli - in my opinion - had that potential.  Like McCoy, he was unfortunate and he ran out of luck (or grip actually), but if his luck had not run out, he would have had every chance to go on and become a legend like Rainey or Doohan.

In the words of Mick Doohan, Simoncelli was a little bit looser than a lot of people.  Eventually that would cost him his life, but it was also what made it awe inspiring to watch him ride.

I'll miss him.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Marketing Gone Wrong

First of all - I do know that Amazon doesn't really intent for their Kindle to be sold outside the US (for whatever reason) but it's still fairly easy to get one.

However, I gotta say that their latest version - with advertising - seem someone inappropriate or downright silly - in Malaysia:


Trust me - a little snowfall will NOT stop me here.  Anyway - if Amazon want to give me a discount and a laugh - so be it.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Misguided Marketing - Malaysian Style

I think Pavilion qualifies as the shopping mall in Malaysia with the most idiotic marketing campaigns.  It's actually quite entertaining - I end up laughing at something almost every single time I go there.

Here's the latest:


First of all I'd say that car alone would be reason enough never ever to get a savings account at Hong Leong Bank.  What's even more interesting is - who the hell are they actually targeting with that campaign?  10 year old girls?  Any adult willing to drive that car should be locked up in an asylum somewhere.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Goodbye Nokia - It was fun!

I am normally pretty open minded when it comes to technology, but I must admit, when it comes to mobile phones, I have always been a bit of a closet Nokia fanboy.

One of the first mobile phones I ever had (the very first was in fact an Ericsson), was the legendary Nokia 2110 (picture to the right).  Not much to say about that really - it was absolutely rock solid build quality and I am quite sure if I could find a working battery it would still work fine.  Sound and build quality was awesome (as it aught to be - if I am not mistaken the first one cost around US$ 1000 or so).




After the 2110 I went through a pile of Ericsson phones until Ericsson gave up and joined forces with Sony and I dropped my gorgeous T21 on a tile floor.  At this point I bought a Nokia 8210.  This is without a shadow of a doubt the most brilliant phone I have ever used.  It was TINY especially by today's standard and battery life was about a week (no kiddin'!).  I seriously do not think this phone will ever be beaten.
I used this phone for something like 7 years (no kiddin').  At some point the microphone crapped out and I had it replaced.
At some point a friend of mine who was a serious gadget freak was given a Nokia N73 and since he had no use for it - he passed it to me.  While it was quite advanced for the time, it is probably the phone I have disliked the most.  It was bulky - it was SLOW - and battery life sucked big time.  I only used this phone for about a year or so, but managed to kill the stupid little joy stick thingy twice.

Just when I was pretty fed up with the N73, Nokia launched a massive campaign with TV commercials advertising the Nokia 6110 Navigator.  I thought this was pretty damn cool and while I am not crazy about slide phones, I decided to give it a shot.  Much was my surprise that even though the TV commercial was on daily, nobody had this phone in stock in Malaysia and they all wanted to sell me a new N-something (can't remember which one) which was much more expensive.  I called Nokia in Malaysia and bitched about this, and they found one and actually gave it to me just to shut me up.  Anyway - it was actually quite a nice little phone.  The display was smaller than the N73, but it was much quicker and it worked quite nicely.

While I quite liked the 6110 Navigator, this was a period where everybody else - especially LG and HTC - was pumping out "Smart Phones" with touch displays and when Nokia finally got their act together and launched the 5800 ExpressMusic, I just had to have one (and I think I bought one of the first in Malaysia).  Initially the firmware sucked cock, but after 2 or 3 releases - they sort of got it right, and I was quite willing to give Nokia a bit of time to sort it out.  Especially because contrary to the other phones on the market the 5800 was dirt cheap.
This to me will always be the phone that represent Nokia on the top and I really can't understand why it went downhill from this point.

The 5800 with touch screen probably stretched Symbian just about as far as it could go and I was quite excited when Nokia announced the N900 - the first mobile device based on Maemo (which I aught to like since it is essentially a Debian GNU/Linux with a mobile GUI thrown in for good measure).  It was quite difficult for me to get one in Malaysia, but I finally managed to get it a few month after it was released in the state.  A few weeks after I managed to get one, Nokia announced that they would drop future development of Maemo and concentrate on Meego.  This is quite frankly one of the most idiotic decisions I have ever encountered.  Maemo was a bit rough around the edges - and still is - but it was/is a rock solid platform and with a little bit of love and effort the user interface could beat just about anything currently on the market.

Now Nokia is about to release the N9 - their first phone running Meego.  Unfortunately it is quite clear already that it will also be their last.  This time they have announced a change of direction even before  the phone has been released.  Would I buy one?  Well, I would lie if I said I wasn't tempted, but really - no fucking way.  Cheat me once - shame on you, cheat me twice - shame on me, so no - I will not put a cent more into Nokia's pockets.  In fact I have just purchased a Samsung Galaxy S2 and it is awesome so far.  So, goodbye Nokia, it was fun while it lasted, but you have let yourself go.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

How Stupid is This?

Before I get a bunch of complaints that I am always negative, let me begin by stating that I absolutely love my Kindle.  It is probably the single best electronic gadget I have bought, since I bought my HP-28c back in the 80's.

One of the main reasons I think the Kindle is excellent is that it is good - and extremely good that is - at one thing and one thing alone.  Most gadget manufacturers today try to squeeze as much into one gadget as possible and they end up with some gadgets that have great WOW factor, but after the initial interest wears off, they all seem fairly useless really.  I bought a Nook Color about the same time I bought the Kindle, and while the Nook Color turned out to be a pretty descent Android tablet for reading books I hardly ever use it - I use my Kindle.

Anyway, back to topic.  Unfortunately it would appear that Amazon is catching up on throwing useless features into their devices to make them more impressive - or are they?

Notice the title of this product - "Kindle Edition".  The only problem is - it doesn't bloody work on a Kindle (due to the e-ink slow screen updates, they will never be able to display video).  What is worse - it doesn't work on the PC version of the Kindle Reader, nor does it work in their Android version.  In fact - if you look closely at the box in the lower left corner, you will see this only work on Apple devices.

To me this is absolutely insane on Amazon's part.  It is like saying: "Well, we'll sell you a Kindle, but we know it's crap so why don't you buy an iPhone or an iPad instead"?


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Nokia's Death Rattle

It would appear that Nokia is getting somewhat sensitive about negative comments.  Yesterday, someone made this post on Nokia Map's Facebook page:

I wrote the following comment:
No Thanx, I don't think I will.  Some years back you released the N900 with promises of "Free Navigation".  That never materialized and shortly after release you ditched support for that device and hyped about Meego.  Now you ditched support for that too.  I am sorry, but I think I'll stick with Google Maps.
The interesting thing is that someone actually removed that comment within a few hours.  Well, screw you Nokia, I suppose I just have to write the comment here instead and trust me - here it will remain forever (and I mean that literally - should Google ever remove any of my postings, I do have backup and I will move my blog elsewhere)

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Someone Leaked on the Leakers


Today WikiLeaks published this editorial, which, quite frankly, made my day (or ruined it).  It is almost insanely comical and it has hugely changed my perception of WikiLeaks and Julian Assange (more on that later).

To make a long story short, it would appear that someone leaked on the leakers and the resulting reaction from WikiLeaks is - ahem - interesting to say the least.

Let me dive right in.  The first paragraph reads:
A Guardian journalist has negligently disclosed top secret WikiLeaks’ decryption passwords to hundreds of thousands of unredacted unpublished US diplomatic cables.
 I am not convinced that disclosure was at all negligent and in fact in a later paragraph, WikiLeaks themselves states:
Guardian investigations editor, David Leigh, recklessly, and without gaining our approval, knowingly disclosed the decryption passwords in a book published by the Guardian.
"Knowingly?" - didn't they just say it was negligent?

However, where this becomes extremely fishy is when they write:
Over the past nine months, WikiLeaks has been carefully releasing US diplomatic cables according to a carefully laid out plan to stimulate profound changes. A number of human rights groups, including Amnesty International, believe that the co-ordinated release of the cables contributed to triggering the Arab Spring. By forming partnerships with over 90 other media and human rights organizations WikiLeaks has been laying the ground for positive political change all over the world.
I am sorry - "a carefully laid out plan to stimulate profound changes".  A conspiracy in other words.  A conspiracy to manipulate people into using undemocratic means to provoke changes.  Undemocratic means such as - well - revolution.

They go on to write:
Revolutions and reforms are in danger of being lost as the unpublished cables spread to intelligence contractors and governments before the public. The Arab Spring would not have have started in the manner it did if the Tunisian government of Ben Ali had copies of those WikiLeaks releases which helped to take down his government. Similarly, it is possible that the torturing Egyptian internal security chief, Suleiman—Washington’s proposed replacement for Mubarak—would now be the acting ruler of Egypt, had he acquired copies of the cables that exposed his methods prior to their publication.
First of all - they actually themselves use the word revolution here.  In other words, WikiLeaks real agenda is to provoke violent revolutions while using secrecy (read that again - WikiLeaks is deliberately keeping things secret) to achieve their goals.

Let me make it absolutely clear that I find it extremely hard to justify any form of government secrets in a democracy.  I profoundly believe that "people" have a right to know everything their elected "leaders" are up to.  But I find it hugely disturbing when individuals or an organisation such as WikiLeaks are using - what can only be described as stolen information - to fuel their own entirely unannounced political agenda.  A political agenda that obviously includes provoking - or attempt to provoke - violent revolutions.  And I am quite convinced that the poor guy who has been accused of causing this leak in the first place, and who are now rotting away in a military prison quite possibly awaiting execution, only meant for this information to be public knowledge, and not to participate in downright manipulation to aid dodgy political agendas.

On www.wikileaks.org, they write:
WikiLeaks is a non-profit media organization dedicated to bringing important news and information to the public. We provide an innovative, secure and anonymous way for independent sources around the world to leak information to our journalists. We publish material of ethical, political and historical significance while keeping the identity of our sources anonymous, thus providing a universal way for the revealing of suppressed and censored injustices.
Quite frankly - they can stuff this statement up where the light seldom shines. WikiLeaks have - in one pathetic and highly hypocritical editorial - lost all respect I ever had for them.  Initially I found their approach refreshing and even courageous, but now I am left with a feeling of having been manipulated by some self righteous charlatans who's real agenda they choose to keep secret.

It is time WikiLeaks and/or Julian Assange show the world what they are up to.  Release everything you got to the public and let the public make up their own mind.

Monday, August 29, 2011

From Bad to Much Worse

The last 10 years or so have propelled (pun intended) Air Asia from nothing to huge and in general I kind of like them.  I understand the concept of no frill and low cost and it works fine.

Except - for some bizarre reason - they can't seem to get the in-flight "menu" quite right.  I guess I fly Air Asia perhaps once every 2 month or so in average and they always change the menu completely between flights, and some of the choices are quite odd really.  I remember at one point they didn't have coffee on the menu (sure you could get that horrible 3-in-1 stuff - but plain coffee - nope).  Two things are in common of all these menus:

1. They are quite limited
2. Without exception - 80 % of the items are "out of stock"

I am not joking - they are always out of everything.  Take plain Nescafe for example.  It weighs next to nothing.  They must have a pretty good idea how many they need.  How on earth is it possible that they run out on the SECOND flight of the day?  And this is my experience - about half the times I fly Air Asia they don't have plain coffee, but only some disgusting pre-mixed sugar stuff.

Anyway - I started this post by claiming they went from bad to worse, and let me illustrate that with my latest experience only about 5 days ago.  Afternoon flight from Kuala Lumpur to Phuket - and I hadn't had any lunch whatsoever, so I was quite hungry. The first page of the menu looked like this:


Now, that actually looked pretty good, so I tried to order it.  Unfortunately - well you guessed it - Out of stock.

Then I flipped to page two:


The Vegetarian Briyani seemed ok, but well you guessed right again - out of stock.

Then I went to the next item, the Tandoori Chicken Wrap - out of stock.

By this time I was getting slightly annoyed and flipped to the next page:


I didn't really read it much - but just said: "OK, I'll just have a sandwich of some sort", thinking - sandwiches they must have in stock.  The flight attendant lit up and said: "Sure, you can have a Chicken sandwich" to which I replied: "Fine".

THEN - and only then - she added: "But you will have to get Pringles too, because Chicken sandwich only come as a set".  WTF?  I flipped to the next page, and surely:


I went: "But I don't like Soy Milk under any circumstances, and I don't eat Pringles, they make me fatter than I already am, so can't I just have a plain sandwich".  The flight attendants response was: "Only the vegetarian sandwich, that is the only one we sell alone".

Now, I find that fairly idiotic really, but what the hell - by this time anything, and I do mean anything, would do, so I told the flight attendant: "OK, just give me a vegetarian sandwich".  Her reply, and I bet you didn't see this one coming: "Out of stock".  What the hell - she suggested it herself!  What's the point - just teasing me with all the stuff I couldn't get?

By this time I really was getting annoyed, so I went: "Look, you're pretty much out of everything, why don't you just give me a Chicken sandwich?", to which she replied: "Sure, but I will have to charge you RM 1315 for it since it only comes as a set".  I somewhat strongly suggested that she took that up with her supervisor - or whatever they are called on a plane.  2 minutes later she returned and said:

"Ok, I'll sell you a chicken sandwich for RM 9, but ONLY because we're out of Pringles"

Priceless :)  A long argument about a set deal that they didn't have in the first place.  And she actually needed to use their own incompetence as an excuse to sell me a bloody sandwich.

How is it possible to screw up this consistent - even on a no frill low cost airline?

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

How to Piss of and Annoy your Customers

I've stayed in the central part of Kuala Lumpur for almost 10 years and one thing that is sorely lacking in that area is descent super markets.  There's a few "Giant" (OK for canned stuff but not for anything else), a "Cold Storage" (which is OK but severely overpriced and I get claustrophobic in their KLCC branch), "Mercato" (new kid on the block and probably the best one now) and then there is "Isetan" in Lot 10.


For years, Isetan has been the best option and for years it has been going steadily downhill - downhill to a point where it's becoming a bad joke.

One example is their "Non Halal" section.  For some utterly bizarre reason they insist on wrapping all their food in some rather ungreased grease paper.  I don't know what kind of discount product they are using, but the result is that after 12 hours in the fridge, the paper has dissolved into a rather nasty pulp that is sticking to the meat.  I have for years pointed this out to the Chinese lady that usually take care of that part of the shop but they are still using exactly the same paper, and I still avoid buying anything there that isn't shrink wrapped.


But by far the biggest problem is their bakery.




When they do have bread it is actually one of the better bakeries in Malaysia - as in their baguettes actually last more than a few hours and they are almost acceptable the next day.  Unfortunately they don't seem very keen on selling any and mostly their shelves look like this:




They seem to have two modes of operation.  If I go there before - say 2 in the afternoon (the above pictures were taken at 12:30), without exception they will have bread in "half an hour".  If I decide to go later - say around 5pm, the shelves are equally empty and they have "sold out" (with no plan to restock).  I am NOT joking here - they appear to have a random window of about an hour or so, sometimes in the afternoon, where the bakery actually sell freshly baked bread. I think I see fresh bread there one out of 10 times I pass by and that is NEVER in the morning and NEVER in the evening.  And this problem have been steadily getting worse over the past few years.  4-5 years back (before the renovation) they usually had bread at all times, these days - almost never.


Typically when buying groceries one has got quite a lot to carry and it is damn annoying to have to go somewhere else.  I've had situations where I had shopped for a nice salad only to find that there was no bread available whatsoever.


The result of this is obvious.  I have started to go to Mercato instead.  Their bread is not nearly as good as it was in Isetan (back when they still bothered to make any) but they are always well stocked and I never had to leave the shop without what I intended to buy.


I find it difficult to get my head around this ridiculous business practice.  Sure, no shop like to throw out food that has gone bad, but flour is about RM 1.50 pr. kg and there's probably what - 150 gram in a baguette.  If Isetan lose ONE customer on this practice (and they have mostly lost me and I have seen other people complain about it) they already lost more than if they had to throw out 10 baguettes a day (and surely they could find better use for them before they expire).  On their website, they have the nerve to write:
"Isetan's 'customer first' guiding principal is embodied in all aspects of our services"
I am sorry but this is  absolutely ridiculous - surely they mean "customer last".  As obvious from the experience I have described, Isetan couldn't care less about their customers - all they wish is to save a few bucks and run the operation as cheap as humanly possible, no matter how badly it hurts the quality of their products and their service.

I have send the link to this blog entry to Isetan in Malaysia (through their web-site) and the holding company in Japan (also through their web-site) and any reaction or lack thereof will be added here.

Update Jul. 20, 2011

As mentioned, I did use the contact form on their web-site, but obviously this "customer first" company couldn't be bothered to send me a reply.  Absolutely useless and non-existent customer service, which is a bit of a surprise considering Isetan is Japanese and the Japanese usually take customer interaction quite serious.

Oh - and their web-site hasn't been updated since 2009 and it has been hacked quite badly (try to click on the Facebook logo).  Amateurs!

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Excuse me - Kiss your what? Sure thing baby!

During a walk to Pavilion (Bukit Bintang, Kuala Lumpur) today, I came across a huge marketing campaign for the Chinese car maker Chery.  What really caught my attention was the name of the event:


Now this could be an attempt to be very funny - but this being Malaysia and Chery being Chinese I somehow just think they forgot to - or was too stingy to - check it with a native English speaker.

One thing for sure - I am glad that it was Chery that was responsible for this event and not Hyundai or Hino (Japanese truck/bus manufacturer).  I can only imagine what could come out of that.

Kiss my Heinie?

Chery's paddling around in the pool is still better.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Why Bother?

If there's one thing I hate it's "customer hotlines".  Usually they are a total waste of everybody's time.  However, one thing is to support existing customers poorly, quite another is to support potential customers poorly.

The battery in my Asus Eee PC have gone quite bad after about 1 1/2 years or so, which in this climate is just about what can be expected.  So today I called Asus just to hear if they have any replacement batteries in stock and if they had, where to go and purchase one.  The guy I spoke with was obviously going according to a script and refused to deviate from it.  He insisted on serial number (which with my eye sight is next to impossible to read), name, email, phone number and in each case I had to repeat it about 4-5 times and spell it out before he got it.

After about 5 minutes or so (+ the 10 I had been waiting in their queue) he finally got around to asking me how he could help me.  I asked my question and he promised to call back.

Needless to say I never got any call back.  If it wasn't for the fact that I just bought an IdeaPad I would say that Asus lost a customer, but they actually did that even before this happened.

My question is - why do they even bother to pretend to be helpful, when they have absolutely NO intention of helping?

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Solid Car

Solid build quality is not the first thing I would relate to Proton.



Almost as bad as the Naughty Volvo.

Another question is - can a car "have" criteria?

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Steve "Big Brother" Jobs is Watching You

Anybody remember the 1984 Macintosh ad:



It's highly ironic that a hidden file recording all movements of iPhone users has just been discovered.

No information yet what Apple is doing with that file but it apparently records location from GPS, Wifi Access Points and GSM Cells several hundred times a day and keep those records in a hidden file on the device forever.

Here's a discussion from the people who discovered this:



I think this is quite amazing.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Really Tasty

Lately this ad has been popping up online:


Colored burgers???  That look _really_ tasty :)

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Who would have thought...

Who would have thought it was possible to use the word "naughty" and the word "Volvo" in the same sentence?


Don't get me wrong - I like Volvo and have always liked their cars but "naughty" they are not.

Naughty is something along this line:


And _that_ is most certainly not a Volvo.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Dangerous Food Storage

I was just about to buy some Salmon from Giant (in Sungai Wang), when I noticed that it felt kind of - well - let me just say "not cold".  That made me check the temperature of the cooler:

 
In fact it was 9 degrees when I first saw it, but even 8 is at least 6 degrees too warm.  What makes this even more worrying is that this picture was taken a few hours ago - on Apr. 10.  As is obvious from the above image, no staff have actually bothered to check the temperature since the 6th.  I would say if that salmon have been stored at a temperature 6 degrees too high for 4 days, it would be downright dangerous to eat it.

So - big fat warning - if you actually buy food in Giant, make sure to check the temperature before you buy.

I have provided a link to this post to Giant through their web-site.  If they bother to make any explanations I will post it here as an update.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Fried Porpoise

Two days ago I came across this article on BBC News.  From the article:

A baby porpoise that was washed over a mile (about 2km) inland by Japan's tsunami earlier this month has been rescued from a flooded rice paddy.
There's also a very nice picture of a guy carrying the unfortunate animal back into the ocean:


Today's top news on the same site here, reads:

Levels of radioactive iodine in the sea near the tsunami-stricken Fukushima nuclear plant are 1,250 times higher than the safety limit, officials say.
The readings were taken about 300m (984ft) offshore. It is feared the radiation could be seeping into groundwater from one of the reactors.
In other words, first a tsunami carries the animal two kilometres inland, then some misguided tree hugger throw it straight back a part of the ocean heavily contaminated with radioactive iodine.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

People Full of Shit - Some More Than Others

I just saw a claim on History Channel (Sliced):



3 years?  I am sorry but anybody who spend 3 years of their life sitting on a toilet is full of shit - it's that simple.  Assuming an average life expectancy of 75 years that is very close to one hour a day - a full hour.  I personally doubt I spend more than 10 minutes myself and I am in fact full of shit - a fact most readers of this blog can testify to.

Later in the show they claim:


Well, that is definitely closer to the truth - except - I actually think that is quite low.  Assuming the before mentioned average person take a dump twice a day and a piss 4 times a day - and said person actually flush after both, what would come up to 164000 times.  In other words - contrary to their previous claim, this number is actually quite low.

Conclusion - well - History channel is entertainment - pure and simple - and they obviously do not spend a hell of a lot of time researching their claims.  Never trust a bloke who cut up a toilet with an angle grinder.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Service Dome Style

I wave written before about the odd service - or lack thereof - in Dome (KLCC).



Bad or no service is fairly common in Malaysia and so is rude or clueless staff. Dome however is not short staffed, the place is literally packed with staff. They do however seem to take ignoring customers to a whole new level.

Last time I was there, they ignored me for 20 minutes before they told me to get lost because the table I was sitting at was reserved. This time I think they decided to tease me a bit - at least it was a new and rather unique approach.

After about 5 minutes a waiter, rushing pass my table, asked if someone had taken my order yet. I answered: "no, nobody have bothered yet", but I am not completely sure she heard my reply, because by the time I started to answer she had already walked on to clean the next table. She returned 5 minutes later and asked if I was ready to order. I replied that I had been ready all the time but nobody bothered to ask before. Once again, she didn't seem awfully interested in my reply, because she once more walked on leaving me talking to myself.

Finally after another 5 minutes or so another waiter came and asked me to repeat my order. This one managed to stay long enough for me to explain I hadn't had a chance to order and I would like a cup of coffee.

It is one thing to be ignored by waiters - which is their usual approach in Dome - but this is a completely different ballgame. Why the fuck do they ask questions if they are not the least bit interested in the reply. It's rude and it's a complete waste of everybody's time.

It's amazing that place is still alive.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Idiotic idea!

From Planet F1:

"F1 boss Bernie Ecclestone is considering creating artificial rain during races to spice up the sport.
With overtaking becoming increasingly difficult in dry conditions, more and more people are looking to the weather gods to intervene with a bit of rain. In 2010, most of the on-track excitement was caused by some heavy downpours.
Ecclestone has taken note of this and believes he has come up with a cunning plan.
"Overtaking is almost impossible because in the dry there is only one line good for maximum speed because of the rubber on the track," he told the official Formula One website. "You have a completely different picture when it is wet. We always had the most exciting races in the wet so let's think of making rain...

Amazing!  I got a much better idea.  Why not install explosive wheel nuts on all the cars - programmed to explode at random times.  It would have as much to do with car racing as artificial rain, but I am sure it would lead to some absolutely spectacular crashes.

There was also some talk that all the Tilke designed tracks were boring and too forgiving.  Take Singapore for example:


It is obvious to me that Tilke missed an absolutely AWESOME possibility here.  What they really need is to change turn 8 and turn 14 into either an intersection or a good old fashioned round-about.  Now THAT would lead to spectacular - well - ahem - show if not racing. In fact they could start by taking Top Gear up on their offer of using the Top Gear test track instead of Bahrain (a figure-8 track without an over or under pass). We need more intersections in F1.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

How the Hell do They do That?

I was playing around with Google Maps on my savagely hacked Nook Color "e-book reader" (well it was - now it's an Android tablet), when I noticed this:



That is in reality a circle of I guess less than 100 m in diameter and the center is less than 20 m from my actual location at the time (which is the tall building to the left of the circle of confidence - right next to the pool that is half visible).  Now I am fairly used to this from various mobile phones with built-in GPS, but here is the interesting part: "This is a Nook Color"!!!  It has not got built-in GPS and it most certainly hasn't got any kind of cell-phone radio built-in either.  The only means of wireless connectivity is Wifi.  How the hell do they do that???

Technically I reckon there are two possibilities:

1. They use whatever IP address I connect from when I access the maps server
2. They triangulate the Wifi SID's

I am fairly convinced it's not the first of these options.  By checking the IP address I reckon they might be able to put my location within perhaps a few kilometers if their database of IP addresses are extremely detailed, but there is no way they could possibly achieve the level of confidence that they display here.

In other words they must use Wifi triangulations and the fact that they can do that in the first place is quite mind boggling really.  People put up new wireless access points and switch off old ones all the time.  In other words, Google must have access to information about visible access points in "near real time".  There is only one way they can do that and that is harvesting statistics each time a GPS and Wifi enabled phone connect to Google.

I am not particularly worried about Google knowing where I am.  After all - that is the whole point of their Latitude service.  However I do find it slightly dodgy if Google collect the statistical information from GPS enabled devices.  When I use my Nokia 5800 to connect to Google Maps, obviously it will send the GPS information about my location to Google.  But the fact that they might send information about visible Wireless access points (and probably cell phone towers too) is a bit questionable.  While I don't pay any traffic charges for my 3G connection a lot of people do and I don't remember Google telling me that I am contributing to their business in this way.

I guess I will have to do some network sniffing in the near future.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Barnes & Noble Profit Drops

Just saw this article on BBC:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-12544612

It describes how Barnes & Noble's profit for the 3 month until end of January 2011 has dropped 25 % compared to previous year.

How on earth can that be a surprise to them?  As I have described in detail here, they have absolutely zero respect for their customers and their so-called support is a joke - nothing less.  They are absolutely clueless.

As described in blog entry I actually wrote an email to Barnes & Noble's director of investor relations Mr. Milevoj, and in that email I described the problems Barnes & Noble's customer's are facing - in great detail.  Well, I never heard back from Mr. Milevoj, but if ever the shit hits the fan so to speak, at least he can't claim that he has been unaware of just how bad things are.

As for me, I have been pissed on so badly that I will never ever spend another cent at their on-line store.  They actually managed to ship a Nook Color to me at the end, and I tell you what - the very first thing I did was to root it and the second thing I did was to install Amazon's Kindle application on it.


Saturday, February 19, 2011

Lonely Fire Hydrant

Pavilion, Kuala Lumpur's latest shopping mall, is usually quite packed, so I never noticed what has got to be the weirdest located fire hydrant in the world:





I wonder how many knees that has crushed.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Aught to be Bleeding Obvious

From Glory Beach Resort in Port Dickson:



I wonder why that sign is necessary.

Update

Well, I wrote this blog entry in the evening.  Next morning during breakfast I realised the sign is indeed necessary, albeit completely ignored.  Half the guests were running bread with butter and jam through that toaster and it was quite smelly from burned sugar.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Warning - Barnes & Noble Lies

Some month back I bought myself a Kindle from Amazon.  Two things happened almost instantaneously:

  1. I became a complete "convert" (I always maintained that I preferred real paper books but now I really do prefer electronic books)
  2. I discovered that one e-book reader is really not enough (it's annoying when someone else read the same book you're reading - but it's even more annoying when someone take your entire book collection)

Because of this I did briefly consider buying a second Kindle.  However, the Nook Color was released a short while after I bought my first Kindle, and while I am quite convinced the e-ink display is better on the eye, the fact that you can "root" the Nook and get at least some tablet functionality, did appeal to me.  I therefore decided to get a Nook Color too.

I entered an order on Jan. 11.  By the time I entered the order they promised 2-3 days shipping and quite right, by the time I had finalized the order, Barnes and Noble's site stated that it would be shipping on Jan. 14.  Great!

Friday 14. passed and my Nook still hadn't shipped from Barnes and Noble.  Monday 17. they finally updated their order status and it now said it would ship on Fri. 21 instead.  Not so great.

Seriously, these days, running a massive logistic such as the one Barnes and Noble must be running, it shouldn't be that bloody hard to predict correctly.  They know exactly what they got in stock, they know exactly how many outstanding orders they've got, they know exactly what shipments they are expecting, they know exactly how quick they can shovel the parcels out of their warehouse - it can NOT be that hard to predict when they are going to ship.  Anyway - one week delay wasn't too bad, so I just waited it out.

On Thursday 20. the order status suddenly changed.  They still listed 21 as the shipping date, but there was a note that they were experiencing delays and unless I click a button saying I still wanted the Nook, they would automatically cancel my order.  Quite frankly I had already noticed their delay and since the expected shipping date was still listed as 21 (which was exactly 1 week late compared to their original promise) I did click the button saying I still wanted my Nook.

On Friday 21. I rechecked the order status and now it looked like this:


Excuse me - February 20 - WTF!  IF they actually manage to do that and this is not just another idle lie, that means they are expecting 6 weeks instead of the 3-4 days they originally promised.

I am completely and utterly flabbergasted by this approach!  I can understand delays.  Perhaps they received a batch that didn't live up to their expectations, perhaps a truck crashed, perhaps a ship sunk.  Those are all understandable.  What I do NOT understand is why Barnes & Noble make promises they have no intention of keeping.  When their web-site state 2-3 days I as a customer expect that they have enough devices in stock and the moment I enter my order, their computer flag one of those as mine and it's merely a matter of getting it pushed out of the door.  But I am obviously wrong - very very wrong.  When Barnes & Noble say 2-3 days it obviously only means they will try to do that but if they can't they'll just keep changing the promise.

If this was a one-off I guess that would be understandable too.  However, if I were dumb enough to make a new order, this is what Barnes & Noble now promise:


Ships in 2 weeks.  Sorry guys - how the hell can you promise potential new customers that you will ship in 2 weeks, while at the same time you got existing customers waiting 6 weeks?  That is mind boggling stupid and quite offensive.

On their support page, they got a neat link listing the "Top 10 Reasons to do Business with Barnes & Noble".  Number 6 is:


This must be an example of the fact you can get surveys to state whatever you want them to state.  Let us dig into that a bit!  The footnote reads:

Number one rating in customer satisfaction in the entire e-commerce category of 200 companies, according to the 2007 American Customer Satisfaction Index of the University of Michigan.
I found that here and it looks like this:


Excuse me?  How can they claim to be number one?  I would say that they consistently rate worse than for example Amazon - NOT anywhere near number one.

I don't know what it is they take pride in - lying?  Number 9 is:


Yes guys - the world's most advanced eReader would be a reason to do business with you.  That is - it would be a reason if it was available.  But clearly it is not.

I've had my Kindle for 3-4 month now and I love it.  When I ordered it (or anything else for that matter) from Amazon, they have always - without exception - shipped exactly when they promised to ship.  I had a suspicion that I would like the Nook Color even more than I like my Kindle, but unfortunately Barnes & Noble went out of their way to piss me off the moment they received my credit card details.

Let me give Barnes & Noble a bit of free advice:

  1. If you don't know when you can deliver, then write that on your shopping site. Then I can make a qualified decision if I can be bothered doing business with you or take my business elsewhere. Lying only serves to piss your customers off.
  2. If you have no intention of supporting your customers, then don't put an e-mail address on your web-site. Writing a reply with a link to the web-site is patronising and idiotic. Hint: I already know the bloody URL - that is where I found the e-mail address in the first place.
  3. If you don't hire enough staff to pick up the phone, don't bother putting a phone number on your web-site. Letting your customers wait for 45 minutes (or even worse - hang up on them according ot quite a lot of posts on the facebook page) again only serves to piss off people.
  4. If you don't have the competence to sell things on-line, make a deal with someone who do know how to do this - amazon.com springs to mind.

I wrote an email to their support and posted a link to this blog on their official facebook page and I will update this post with any reply - that is if they ever reply.

Update Jan. 23. 2011

Just received the following email from Nook Support:

Dear Valued Customer,

We received your recent email and apologize that we have not responded.
We are experiencing unusually high email volume, and want to assure you
that your concerns are always very important to us.

We invite you to have a look at our Help Desk by clicking on this link:

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/help/help.asp

We?ve worked hard to include answers to many of our customer?s questions
right here, so the solution you are looking for may be right there.

If you have a question about the status of your order, please check the
information we provide on your online account.  If you placed an order
without an online account, just click on the drop down menu under My
Account in the upper right corner of our website.  Complete the
information on the left side of the screen and click on View Order.  As
always, you can rely on the information sent to you in your shipping
confirmation email, which also includes a link to track delivery.

If you still need our help, we are available by phone from 8:00 AM to
11:00 PM Monday-Friday and 9:00 AM to 11:00 PM on Saturdays and Sundays,
EST.   Call us at 1-800-THE-BOOK (843-2665), international customers can
reach us at 201-559-3882.   Please note that due to high call volume,
you may experience a delay in reaching a Customer Service
Representative. 

Thanks again for your patience and loyalty during this busy time.

Sincerely,


Barnes & Noble
http://www.bn.com


This electronic mail message contains information that (a) is or
may be CONFIDENTIAL, PROPRIETARY IN NATURE, OR OTHERWISE
PROTECTED
BY LAW FROM DISCLOSURE, and (b) is intended only for the use of
the
addressee(s) named herein.  If you are not an intended recipient,
please contact the sender immediately and take the steps
necessary
to delete the message completely from your computer system.

Not Intended as a Substitute for a Writing: Notwithstanding the
Uniform Electronic Transaction Act or any other law of similar
effect, absent an express statement to the contrary, this e-mail
message, its contents, and any attachments hereto are not
intended
to represent an offer or acceptance to enter into a contract and
are not otherwise intended to bind this sender,
barnesandnoble.com
llc, barnesandnoble.com inc. or any other person or entity.
Notice:

  1. They spend just about the same covering their ass legally as they do answering
  2. The answer got absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with my request - nor does it show any hint that they actually bothered to read my email
I suspect they claim that this email is confidential because it is downright embarrassing, but I don't give a hooth.   This level of support is so poor and inadequate I think anybody who even remotely consider purchasing anything from Barnes & Noble deserve to be warned beforehand.

I can also add that Barnes & Noble have started sending me lots of email ads  even though I have never opted in to that.  I am getting increasingly convinced that Barnes & Noble represents the worst example I have ever seen of incompetence and lack of business ethics.

There is a very very good reason why Amazon had a net profit of 902 million US$ in 2009 while Barnes & Noble had a net profit of 75 million - and I am actually surprised they had a profit at all.  They most certainly do not deserve it.

After receiving the email, I went to check my order status and woe and behold:

They actually cancelled my order even though I clearly stated earlier that they should not cancel the order even if I should have. Let me repeat - I did NOT cancel this order - Barnes & Noble cancelled it themselves!!! Ah well - guess I'll just get some standard Android tablet.

As a final attempt to get their attention, I did send the following email to Barnes & Noble's director of investor relations. After all, the top management aught to be somewhat concerned since the Barnes & Noble shares haven't exactly been doing pretty over the past 5 years:



I doubt I will hear back from them, but if I hear anything I will post it here.

Dear Mr. Milevoj,
First let me apologize for sending this email directly to you. Unfortunately your direct email was the only one available on Barnes & Noble's web-site, and well - poor service is definitely something that will concern shareholders, so I trust that you will manage to forward this email to whoever appropriate.
About 3 weeks ago I got curious about the Nook Color device and without doing any research whatsoever I just went to Barnes & Noble web-site and ordered one. To cut a very long and very sad story short, I have described the whole experience in detail here:
http://larsrants.blogspot.com/2011/01/warning-barnes-and-noble-lies.html
I have since done quite a lot of on-line research on the topic of Barnes & Noble customer care and the scale of complaints are quite massive. I don't know if you got any staff directly assigned to deal with for example your own facebook page (http://www.facebook.com/barnesandnoble) but if not I urge you to take a quick look at the Discussion forum on that page. There are quite a lot of people out there who feel quite cheated by Barnes & Noble and these days these complaints show up quite readily on Google.
--
Lars Boegild Thomsen

If I hear any reply from them I will post it here.

Update Feb. 01 2011:

Just to prove a point I tried to order a new Nook - after Barnes & Noble cancelled my original order and here's the result:


That's right - the original order from Jan. 11 (the one that B&N cancelled) had an expected shipping date of Feb. 21, while the new order is expected to ship on Feb. 15. Not that I trust B&N to actually try to keep their promises.


Update Feb. 2, 2011

It has not really got anything to do with B&N as such, but just before I placed this last order, I also ordered an electronic gadget from Amazon. The Amazon order shipped 6 hours (!!!) - I am not shitting 6 hours after I placed the order.